Having someone help you to look after the kids in your own home can be a necessary part of life. But many parents don’t clearly communicate exactly what they expect of those people looking after their children. Often there are many things that you would assume this carer would or would not do.
At our house we have “The Millar Family Guidebook” which outlines exactly what is expected of them. It covers:
1. Contact details – Mine and my husband’s, as well as three other immediate contacts such as grandparents and all of the contact details of the carer. This should also have all of the contact details for the carer as well. Don’t forget about their next of kin too, or an alternative number in case you can’t contact them.
2. Fire safety – where the fire extinguisher and fire blanket are and how to use them. This also includes what to do if the smoke alarm goes off.
3. Emergency plan – where we are to all meet, somewhere near the house, but far enough away if there was danger.
4. Medical help – steps the carer should take e.g. Call the ambulance or call us. For our carer, English is a second language, so I have written exactly what they need to say to the operator in the case of fire or ambulance including instructions on how to find our house.
5. Fuse box and circuit breaker – in case the power goes out, they know where the fuse box is and what to do
6. Rules for TV and computer use – always a big one in our house.
7. Rules for discipline
8. Physical contact with the children – be upfront with this so there can’t be any confusion. We tell our au pair that the only physical contact should be a high five or a fist bump and the children will shower themselves. This all depends on the age of the kids of course. Don’t feel uncomfortable about spelling this out. Your carer will appreciate knowing exactly what is expected of them, especially when you have someone from another county who may not be sure of the customs.
9. Free time activities – what is and isn’t acceptable
10. Food – what the children can and can’t eat.
11. The Kitchen – levels of cleanliness. Don’t assume all people know about cross contamination and chicken juice.
12. Daily jobs – let your carer know what is required of them. It’s not fair on them if they have to guess. Have a clearly defined list of duties and requirements. They’ll thank you for it.
13. Collecting the children from school
14. The car
Finding someone to help you to look after the kids in your home is a daunting task. Quite often you are in desperate need and keen to qualify someone quickly. It’s easy to see the good information and harder to find the unfavourable. Ask for a minimum of three references and don’t be afraid to dig around. Ask how they would discipline the children. You can find out a lot about a carer by asking this question.
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